As Eleanor Roosevelt once said— 'Do one thing every day that scares you.' 🙀🌸💪🏻

I took a leap and did my first live webinar to a pretty big audience ( okay semi big lol) 
Teaching the webinar earlier was many things: exciting, new, fun, terrifying, motivating, exhilarating, and definitely not perfect.

It reminded me of the very first time I was on stage in front of 1,000 people, shivering in my costume heels and I forgot to turn my microphone on for my big singing solo.


It's funny how the Tech Crash on my webinar even occurred... I rehearsed it so many times, tested everything, and did double, triple, quadruple checks on all the software before I went live....

yet still it seems, we can have errors, hiccups, glitches, and unexpected "weather" come down on us. While my mini webinar meltdown was happening ( for the whole 4 minutes it happened, which felt more like 4 hours) , I was definitely trying to not pass out from embarrassment.. Obviously I didn't MEAN for that to happen, why would I be so excited to teach a class if I knew that was going to happen!?! Puh,leeeze- if I knew that was going to happen, I would have canceled the damn class !

I for the first time, saw some people throw some "hate comments" my way while the meltdown was happening, which obviously hit my heart like a piercing dagger and it obvi hurt a ton to see a few people say rude things to me.  

In my head, I kept thinking " why is this person attacking me right now? Can't they see I'm doing my best and am already embarrassed" - 

Let me paint you a picture of how it felt... it was like I had a couple people throw rotten fruit at me while I was on stage, right after tripping on a cord and smashing my nose and twisting my ankle, and I was holding back tears in pain, I ripped my dress while getting back up to finish singing my grand finale....my voice was shaky, my heart beating 100 miles a minute for the remaining of the class, and my eyes were floating in a well of held back tears.. That's how it felt. .. whelp.. ( I'm doing my best right NOW in these circumstances is all I could keep hearing in my head).. 

Things will only feel as awful as we allow them to feel... you see.. 

The good news is WAY more people were understanding and threw beautiful flowers, emails and gratitude at me at the end anyways ( now those are the people I love, let's be friends- thank you for understanding I'm human and not a magical unicorn superwoman that can save a tech meltdown from the universe's  random acts of webinar attacks.) I want to celebrate the wins! ( obviously learn from the mistakes) But see the beauty in the crash.. I'm now a much more understanding audience member to anyone ever hosting a webinar... may it be smooth as freshly shaved legs rubbed in coconut oil (now thats smooth...) 


I learned that I definitely cannot control the universe and learned that technology can have a mind of its own ha! Thank you to everyone who stuck through the beginning tech glitches, you are amazing it was great to have you.

I am super duper happy that still so many of you reached out to me and said you learned so much in the class! My heart is full!


I hope you did one thing today that ‘scares’ you today.
It’s the best way to move forward in the direction of you dreams, even if you have to 'fall' upward. Just like I did...in this episode in my human, non-perfect life. 

You must do the things that are new and terrifying to get to where you want to go, nothing new will ever feel easy or go perfect, take the leaps, I’ll cheer you on!

Fail hard, fail often, fail fast!

<3 Crystal 🙌🏻❤️🌹🌸

 

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